
Being Pregnant Doesn’t Mean You Have To Be Frumpy
It’s still the case that humans want to keep propagating the species, thank goodness. But what humans — especially the women who have done all the work to get the species propagated — quickly find out is that pregnancy can turn a beautifully clothed female into a frump if she’s not careful. Being pregnant doesn’t mean you have to be frumpy, though, because high style is still possible, fortunately.
Guys are really advised to think on things for a few minutes. They should put down the Three Stooges DVD collection and think about how something as elegant as possible is today available even in maternity wear. Certainly, a woman will need a self-image boost after finding that Vera Wang has deserted her during her hour of need (and nine months of pregnancy).
It’s a fact of human biology that pregnancy and women are literally joined at the hip, and that’s a good thing because if it were up to men to become pregnant our species would’ve died out long ago. So help that woman adjust to pregnancy, or she’s going to end up taking it out on the man who got her that way, and it won’t be pretty. In fact, it might be mixed-martial-arts-beatdown ugly.
One way to help a woman deal with the fact that her most treasured clothing will have to be put away for a while, and maybe even forever because she became pregnant, is to get her out the door into the shopping mall. At the least, it can be humble gesture on the part of the guy who’s put her in this predicament and it also can help save him from that fabled beating he so richly deserves.
Help her shop for that pair of leather brown boots she’s always wanted. Go to work, earn some money, save it up (what a novel concept) and then accompany her to the three dozen shoe stores she’s going to need to visit to find those boots. It’ll be a very reasonable price, considering that she’s now decided that she’s willing to become twice her size all on a man’s behalf.
Once she’s found the right pair of boots, slip away for a few minutes — taking care to avoid the electronics store where that new big-screen TV is on display — and maybe buy her something nice to go with those boots, perhaps a matching leather watch strap. It’s certainly an easy way to get out of the doghouse that has been like a second home since she became pregnant, correct?
There’s really nothing to helping a woman understand that being pregnant doesn’t mean that being a frump is just around the corner. Tell her she’s beautiful, wise, Goddess-like — even after her pregnancy has caused her to swell up like a puffer fish — and, above all else, be ready to spend a little money to help her find a few things to keep her from being frumpy.
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